Kaizoku no Blin/7
"Get Woke, Go Broke" is the seventh episode of the Kaizoku no Blin fan fiction series. Intro music: BRADIO - Golden Liar NOTE: ---- Voice: I controls this zone. Hope you like my little game I set up. Johanne: GRRRRRRRR!!! Just fucking show yourself for fuck's sake! Voice: Yo' anger and language goes off the charts. I love it. Johanne: Can't you just stop talking? I hate your voice! Now, can you just come down here, PLEASE? Voice: Alright! Damn it! For the love of God, I'm goin' down! Bitch. Moufassa: What did you just call her? I'll hit you once you get here! Voice: Why won't the other two guys talk? Don't you care for your crew members? Hansuke: Of course we do. But it's not what you think. Jonathan: We don't like reacting. Moufassa: You didn't answer the question. Where are you? The voice doesn't answer. ---- The voice stops speaking and a shadowy figure appears in the control room. Johanne: What's that strong wind? Moufassa, is that you farting? Moufassa: I don't know! And why does it always to be me? Even back home, everyone blames natural disasters on me! Johanne: Did I just blame you? Oh, no. So clumsy. Moufassa: Screw you! A dark-skinned person appears behind Johanne. Johanne: Oh, fuck you too! I already apologized for what happened and you still whining? Moufassa: Johanne? Johanne: I don't care about what you're saying. Just listen to me, you childish prick... Moufassa (while Johanne mumbles): J-J-J-Jo-Joha-hanne? C-Can y-y-you please look at your back? Johanne: I won't watch my back. I'm pretty sure there's nothing in there. ---- A teargas suddenly triggers on their location. A woman suddenly whacks Johanne in the head. Moufassa: Johanne! Are you okay?! Johanne! Please respond! Man: Nice job, Mandala. Mandala: Happy to be of service, Master Kwaito! Kwaito: There be another man around. Wait somewhere else and I'll pop his ass. Mandala: Okay! Kwaito proceeds to Moufassa's location and sees him lying down. Kwaito: Yo! Havin' a good day, homie? Moufassa: I'm not your homie, fool. Kwaito: I'm not a fool either. Now get over here! Moufassa (spitting on Kwaito's shoes): Fuck. You. And who are you? Kwaito grabs his baseball bat and hits him in the head. Kwaito: Mah name... is Kwaito. ---- Kwaito (contacting his members on the phone): Yo, Basenji! What's going on up there? Basenji: The samurai man's quite a tough man, nigga! I got a cut on my arm! But he was disposed of. Just get ready with the blimp, man! Kwaito: I miss the boss treatment so bad! But hey, once we done, I'll set up the blimp. Basenji: I got one less problem to worry about. For now... Kwaito (whistles): Where are you, Mr. Captain? Or whomever he is. Why the fuck is he so silent anyway? It's deafening! No, this is insulting! Kwaito enters a seemingly dark room and meets Jonathan. Kwaito: Hey, man. What'ya doing round here? Jonathan: What do you think? Kwaito: I just wanna fight a man worthy of my skills. I disposed yo' mates too. Jonathan: So? Are you gonna fight me or what? Kwaito: That's it! Show your lingering anger! He's burning like a fayah! Jonathan: Shut up and fight me. Kwaito: Okay! Okay! I get it, how about some music? Jonathan chose not to respond. ---- The two charges at each other. Kwaito: YAAAAAAA!!! Jonathan: HAAAAAAAAAAA!!! Then there was silence. The screen turns all black. Moments later, Kwaito walks outside the room bringing Jonathan's unconscious body and locked him to the bed with the rest of his crew. Kwaito: Here's the lever. Just pull it. My energy ain't keeping up with me anymore. Basenji: How's work, man? Kwaito: NIGGA, AIN'T YOU SEEIN' HOW TIRED I AM?! I was supposed to work that out but damn, this Jonathan mothafucka almost got me! By an inch! Basenji: Ay, ay. Calm down. You can sleep, okay. Let us do the rest. Kwaito: Just make it travel to South Blue, and do the warden work too. You know, we've got guests of honor around here. I trust you on this, okay? Now let me sleep! Basenji: Okay, okay. Here. Yo' privacy, sir. ---- The crew is known as the Cowabunga Pirates. Hailing from the , this crew has been known for smuggling operations as well as combating other pirate crews in the East Blue. They have an sailing ship that can be modified into an airship which can be used to travel the Calm Belt and avoid the s lurking below. Kwaito was sleeping as well as the crew. Basenji monitors them while Mandala and a new character, Ouvriere will be steering the ship. A few days later, they managed to cross Paradise and the second Calm Belt and entered the South Blue. Kwaito wakes up to a bright white light in his room. Basenji: So yo' awake. We here, man. Kwaito: I'll land this shit. ---- Basenji proceeds outside and tells the rest of the crew that Kwaito will handle the wheel. Kwaito: Alright, boys! Prepare all you got 'cuz we landing this baby. Yee-haw! Kwaito: Tell y'all ground people on that phone over there that we've got some visitors with us! Fine, fine ones. Everyone else: Yeah! The crew arrives at their base of operations in Kwanzaa Island, South Blue. It is an unexpectedly fruitful spring island with tropical rainforests and abundant wildlife. However, there is one problem. People. Kwaito's crew comprises of the entire populace so no one else manages to pick the fruits of the island for them. They proceed to the main town, which seemingly has an African theme and its houses are circular and made of local mud bricks. There are some military vehicles located outside of the gates. ---- The following morning, Jonathan and the others find themselves they are tied up. Jonathan: What the fu- Johanne: I can't see shit! And I can't move either! Moufassa: Don't you blame this on me again, Johanne. Hansuke: No one's blaming you, Moufassa. Moufassa (sighs): Just making sure. I'm pretty sure one of you will start blaming me later. Johanne: Nah, this is really not your fault. NOW FIGURE A WAY OUTTA HERE! Moufassa (speaking English in the RP accent): And thegh yew see the woild Jeohawnne Ew Mahley, fohsing the narrey-uh tew folleo heo impossible demawnds. Hansuke: SHUT. UP. ---- Jonathan: Hansuke's right. Shut up. All of you. Moufassa: But Jo- Jonathan: I said "Shut. The. Fuck. Up." Everyone else: Okay. Basenji (holding a phone): Ah, there you go! Everyone is awake, boss! Get down here. Kwaito (responds on the phone): Alright, alright. Calling me "boss" is unnecessary though. I mean you called me a "nigga" the other day. Basenji (chuckles): Whatever, man. These guests, though. What should I do? Kwaito: Nothing. Just make sure they don't escape from my clutch." A few moments later, Kwaito enters the room. He introduced himself loudly. Kwaito: AYY EVERYONE, THIS IS THE GREAT, GREAT KWAITOOOOOOO!!! AND FOR THIS DAILY VLOG, WE GETTIN' SOME SPECIAL GUESTS FO YA! Johanne: Who's this noisy man? I remember him from earlier! Kwaito: AIN'T YOU HAVE AN EAR, GIRL? THIS IS ME, KWAITO! DO I REALLY NEED TO REINTRODUCE MYSELF TO YOU, GIRL?! Johanne: Okay, okay! I get it, but you're literally aiming that megaphone at my ear! Damn, are you trying me to turn even deafer or something? Kwaito: ARE YOU TRYING TO INTERRUPT MY VLOG? I NEVER UNDERSTOOD ANY WORD YOU SAY AND I JUST DID IT FO COMEDY! Johanne slaps Kwaito in the face. Kwaito (drops the megaphone): Mandala, lock her up. She disrespectful. ---- Mandala: Don't you resist. Johanne: I'm not resisting! Sheesh. Mandala: I know that's just a delaying tactic to sway me around. They and their voices disappear into the darkness. Moufassa: JOHANNE! I SWEAR TO MAKE YOU ALL SHITHEADS PAY! Kwaito: AH! BIG WORD, MA NIGGA! Jonathan: I like you better when you were silent. Kwaito: I ain't ever been silent! Unless you ain't deaf like yo' girl. Basenji: He surely is, how come is he mute and almost never talkin'? Kwaito: You the deaf, man. YOU HEARD THE MAN TALK! ---- Meanwhile in a separate room... Johanne (singing): Mandala nearly strikes Johanne at her throat. Mandala: Shut up, bitch! Johanne: No, you're the bitch! I'm just singing and you're the one trying to remove the sunshine away from me? You're not letting the girl relieve herself! Mandala: What sunshine are you talkin' about? Johanne: My voice, goddammit! Mandala: You talkin' to yo' jailer like that, you disrespectful airhead? Johanne: Okay, but are you really sure about that. Mandala: GET OVER HERE! Johanne: If you can. Johanne gets beat by Mandala. Johanne (sings brokenly): TASUKETE, TASUKETE, TASUKETE... JONATHAN... TASUKETE... Jonathan (on his head): Johanne... Johanne? Johanne! ---- << Previous | Next >> ---- Site navigation Category:Kaizoku no Blin Category:Chapters